1. Just Snap out of itThis for me is probably the worst thing you could ever say to me. Anyone with a mental health illness wishes everyday that they could just 'snap out of it'. If we could then why on earth wouldn't we? For most people once you have been diagnosed with a mental health illness it is with you for life. It's important to me that the people around me know this. This is me, I will have good days and bad days but I definitely cannot 'snap out of it'.
2. Just relax
Relaxing for me is just impossible, it's the same as when someone tells you to calm down when your having a panic attack. My mind is in overdrive constantly and I find it so hard to switch off. I have to be busy all the time otherwise my anxiety takes over completely. When someone tells me to relax or calm down when my anxiety is bad it almost feels like there playing the whole thing down. Until you have anxiety or a panic attack you have no idea how horrendous it truly is. To tell me to relax, like what I'm going through is nothing, is actually really hurtful.
3. Did I do something to upset you?
My anxiety has caused me to lose friends in the past because some people just don't understand it. But that's ok, I don't expect you to. The best thing you can do around me is just be normal. If I ever come across as rude or quiet it's because inside I am battling my anxiety and sometimes it's so bad that it takes up every part of me. Just being able to open up and talk to some who wont judge is all I need sometimes. Believe me I just want to be myself but at times this is incredibly hard. Unfortunately I cannot control my anxiety, I just do my best to cope with it.
4. Everything will be fine
This should be a comforting thing to say to someone but for me it's really not. I have generalised anxiety disorder (GAD) so I don't worry about a few things, I worry about EVERYTHING. Telling me everything will be fine really doesn't even begin to touch the surface of what I deal with on a day to day basis. I know I have no control over 99% of the things that cause me to worry but try telling my anxiety that. When your in the depths of anxiety hearing everything will be fine makes it even worse in a way. It makes me feel even further away from reality.
5. There are people worse off than you
Yes thank you I am aware of this. Hearing this makes me feel even more guilty for feeling the way that I already do. Guilt goes hand in hand with anxiety. Every day I feel bad for wasting precious moments of my life focused on the way I feel. I have met others who have anxiety so much worse than me and this in turn makes me think why can't I just got on with things if they manage to cope?
6. Why do you feel like that ?
If only I could answer that question. I would be able to cure myself just like that. I have had anxiety since I was 12 and to this day I still have trouble fully understanding why I feel like this. It's frustrating not to be able to fully explain how I feel and sometimes when I try to I know it sounds like I'm talking gibberish. When someone who doesn't have anxiety or a mental health illness says to me ' I know how you feel' it actually completely trivialises what I go through everyday. That's not me saying please feel sorry for me, it's me saying please don't think that anxiety is just being a little over worried or nervous. It is so much more than that.